As I approached them in a wide aisle of a well know chain store I could tell they were in a pretty serious discussion.
It appeared to be a husband and wife together having a conversation with a lady who was by herself.
As I got closer I heard the lady who I assumed to be the wife say, “It doesn’t matter what I do but he just won’t listen.” The frustration in her voice was obvious.
I must admit to you at this point I slowed my pace so I could hear more.
I must also admit that I may have stopped and looked at a few items in the area so that I could really get the gist of the conversation.
The lady who was by herself said, “So who continues to let him do the things you don’t want him to do?”
It became apparent they were discussing parent/child issues.
The mother said sternly, “I don’t let him do them. He just does them!”
“So you let him do them?”
The mom said, “Well, (looong pause) I guess, maybe, I do. But I’m afraid if I ….”
There it is. Fear in every day life.
It takes courage to be a good parent. It takes courage to tell your kids no. It takes courage to hold them accountable. It takes courage to let them cry and wail.
If you fail to courageously parent your kids when they are young you will pay a great price later on.
Just a few days prior to eavesdropping in on this conversation I had had a coaching conversation with the manager of a department in a retail operation.
He was telling me of a problem employee who had a long history of a variety of infractions, some subtle and some more egregious.
The manager was fairly new to his position and the employee had close to twenty years of service but had been moved from store to store on several occasions because of his bad habits.
The manager was telling me how the employee was always late to work, took extended breaks, and often left before his shift was up.
I asked him what steps he had taken with the employee to curtail this bad behavior.
He responded, “Well, I’ve talked to him about it but he continues to do it.”
The next question I asked was very similar to the one the lady asked the mom.
“Whose job is it to make sure he’s following the same protocols that everyone else has to follow?”
He responded quickly, “I know it’s mine but I’m afraid…..”
There it is again, an opportunity for courage in every day life.
Courage is a word we seem to reserve for policemen, firemen, and soldiers.
If you have fear about something it takes courage to overcome it and work through it.
It takes courage to be a leader. It takes courage to hold people accountable.
How will you lead yourself today?
How will you lead your kids today?
How will you lead your employees today?
Courageously, I hope!
Ephesians 6:4
Have a STRONG and COURAGEOUS day!
“How will you lead yourself today?” What a powerful question to ask myself as I begin another day. Thanks for asking.
You’re welcome, Ron. Most of what I write about is directly relatable to me and my life. This is a question I need to ask myself every day as well!
Ha Ha, have to laugh when I think of you slowing your pace, long legs and all….
Dave, only comment I would make is where you point out that if we do not parent our children “we” will have a great problem later on. My humble view is our child/children will have great problems later on because we have not instilled in them accountability, responsibility and the awareness of consequences. Does that make sense?? Not nit picking, but so many times I see kids acting out, and wonder if that means that they will also act out as adults. Being a parent has always been tough, but more so since my generation, where both parents worked, there is/was this incredible urge to provide and succeed, and then we took discipline away from the school teachers. Just my thoughts……..
Craig, I don’t disagree with you at all. The problems of our adult children are their issues but as their parents I believe we feel the pain of those problems and still want to fix them even though that would only make things worse. My wife shared with me an old saying that someone had shared with her that went like this, “A parent is only as happy as their saddest child.” When our kids hurt, we hurt. I agree with you as well on the school issue as well as we see parents, more often than not, questioning the school rather than their child. What a mess it is! I remember being called into the principal’s office in 1st grade at West Ward Elementary in Wahoo, NE and receiving 5 swats with a paddle. I got another one when I got home as well! Those things would never happen today!